As a multi-passionate mom, do you feel like overwhelm is a normal state of being? You are definitely not alone. Not only are you constantly doing for others and feeling like it’s hard to keep up with your never ending to-do list, you likely often forget about self-care and the importance of meeting your own needs. Does that sound about right?
To help you regain focus of what’s most important to you and let go of what’s not, I’m offering 7 steps for overcoming overwhelm. These can be used any time you are feeling off balance.
1. Get clear on what you want and what’s most important– When you aren’t clear on what’s most important to you, it’s easy to fall into the trap of doing what everyone else wants for you. Their agenda runs your life. When you are clear on your values and priorities and you are honoring them, it’s more difficult to be swayed into a direction you don’t want to go. Take a stand for what’s important to you. Everything else is secondary.
2. Have a clear vision of what you are creating and where you are headed– When you have the big picture in mind, it’s easier to stay on track with where you are headed. It’s also easier to know what to say yes and no to when you are clear about how it fits into the bigger picture. You can create a vision for your business, your life, your family, the holidays, and any other area of your life that is important to you.
3. Say NO to what’s not in alignment with where you are headed– When you have a clear vision and you are honoring your values, it’s much easier to know what is a yes and what is a no. The challenging part can be saying no, even when you know it’s what’s best. Do you feel bad when you should say no to someone so you say yes even though you don’t really want to? What is that costing you? Your precious time, your health, your sanity, connection to loved ones? Do yourself a favor and learn to be less of a people-pleaser and take a stand for your precious time and energy and what you truly want to be spending them on.
4. Focus on one thing at a time– When you are met with multiple obligations, activities, or choices it can feel overwhelming. Choose one thing at a time to focus on and complete, if possible. In the moment, release everything else and do one thing at a time. Multi-tasking can be necessary at times, however, it is not helpful when it causes overwhelm. Choose the most important task to focus on first. Once the first thing has resolution, move on to the next, knowing it will all work out eventually. Here’s the key and probably the most challenging thing to do: Release the need to control and conquer it all. Feeling the need to control causes unnecessary suffering. It doesn’t have to be perfect and you don’t have to do it all. Doing one thing at a time will get it all taken care of in due time and will give you some sanity.
5. Get support & delegate– Look at what you are currently doing and see how much of it you want to be doing. If it is something you don’t love, takes a lot of your time, or is something someone else can do better or more efficiently, then delegate it or let it go completely. Even if you have to pay someone to help you, what does that free you up to do? Is it worth it? Only do the things that bring you joy, are in alignment with your values, or are moving you toward your end goal. Let go of the rest and don’t feel bad about it.
6. Make self-care a priority– Self-care is not selfish, it’s necessary. When you put your well-being as a priority you are more able to take care of others and fulfill what is most important to you. Constantly giving and doing keeps you in a state of depletion and from there you have little to give. As a result, resentment, anger, sadness. lack of patience, and more continue to grow and dominate your being. That is not who you are at the core. Take care of yourself so that you feel more connected to your true self and have more to give to the people and things that matter most.
7. Change your view– Overwhelm is a state of mind. Perhaps you are looking at the situation in a way that causes stress and anxiety. How could you look at your situation differently so that it supports you rather than drains you? For example, consider this scenario…Imagine riding in an airplane and looking out the window from the pilot’s seat, then from first class, and finally from coach. What do you imagine would be different in each experience? The perceived experience will be different for each place depending on what you are focusing on, right? Certain conditions are more conducive to relaxation, yet what you think about will determine how you actually experience the situation. What is your current focus and how might you take a different view? What can you let go of so that you can allow something better?
It can be fun to “try on” different points of view. Some ways of learning to think outside your current viewpoint are to ask yourself, “How would my child see this?”, “What would this experience be like if I were on vacation?”, “How would my pet handle this?”, etc. Allow yourself to get outside the box and see what you can come up with. Make it a fun experience and allow yourself to choose a new perspective that is more supportive of where you want to be.
Bonus Step: If you utilize these 7 tips and still find yourself in overwhelm, then just breathe and keep repeating until you feel more calm. This too shall pass.
I encourage you to create a self-care plan that will support you in being present and enjoying the moment. Perhaps you can even use this plan throughout the year to help you actually feel good while you do the important work you are here to do.
Justine helps women achieve more confidence & courage, work-life balance, inner peace, self-expression, greater impact and fulfillment of life purpose. She works privately with clients, facilitate coaching groups, lead a coaching club community, offer workshops, live events and speaking.
Justine offers a complimentary session to those interested in exploring the opportunity to work with me.
MEAI Members receive:
- A free 50-minute Clarity and Action Coaching Session with Justine (value $200 )
- A 20% discount on her Multi-Passionate Moms Club membership
CLICK HERE to contact Justine and discuss your needs.